DROWNING
Notice the big “I”! I thought I was dealing with the stress of my life. I thought I was exercising enough to lose weight. I thought I was doing enough to stay out of the “BIG D” — in my case depression. I was WRONG! Like a thief in the night, all of a sudden I’m underwater AGAIN. I don’t know what caused it. I know that I didn’t lose a pound, might have gained one or two — which of course doesn’t help. Even though I was walking in the country — up and down the hills for at least an hour each day. It also doesn’t help that I’m finding things at our camper and in our house that I don’t remember. Keep in mind that my father had Alzheimer’s disease. Now I don’t think that is my problem at the moment. I’m hoping that the revolving door of my life has lead to much of the forgetfulness. Automatic pilot — trying to do what needs to be done now — not worrying about the rest. I’ll admit that the years of pain from the ulcer on my leg probably didn’t help. I’ll admit that facing the big 70 this year is not helping. I’ll admit that I’m grousing BIG TIME.
And then I get a nudge. First I opened the daily paper to an article celebrating Ella Jenkins, turning 90, releasing her 40th CD — children’s music of the world. I’ll admit that I didn’t read anything else in the paper. Didn’t read her article at the moment either. Decided that I needed to exercise and turned on Jane Fonda’s Strength Training. Before I switched the TV to VCR, Rachael Ray announced her guest — Tony Bennet — still performing in his 80’s. I’ll admit I had to watch the show — he exercises 3 times a week, warms up his vocal cords before each performance, still loves to entertain. I’m sure if I had a job that I loved, I would still be working. As it was, I had a job from hell that would have been the end of my life if I would have stayed. Beginning of Lent, I quit, and gave up money.
Okay, OKAY, I get the message. I’m not that old. I still have work of some kind to do. And once again I will try.
Wandering With Spirit 