Random Acts of "Kindness"

Posts tagged ‘Angels’

GRANDMOTHER

More than 20 years ago — although struggling with dementia, my father was still alive, — and I was stressed. I listened to various recordings hoping to help with the stress of my world. While at work, I listened to this tape, and I remember thinking “I’m in trouble now.” I don’t remember the title — my guess is Grandmother’s Wisdom. I don’t remember the words but I remember the theme. A grandmother’s responsibility is to use her wisdom to help the next generation regardless of the relationship. It is her job to use her knowledge to help the children of the world. And since I was a grandmother, I was able to relate to the subject matter. Evidently I have ingested those words and made it a part of my life. I don’t stand on ceremony when I see something wrong — I interact with children everywhere.

Since this has become part of my life, we were in the right place, at the right time to help a little one with a problem. Four men and three girls were having breakfast at the restaurant. The men, if not grandfathers, were close to that age. The girls were little, my guess two — six. I planned to go to the bathroom when I noticed only coats occupied the chairs were the girls were sitting. Since the bathroom isn’t large, I decided to wait until they came back out. I didn’t have long to wait when two of the older girls came back to talk to the Dad, then they disappeared back into the bathroom. When this occurred two more times, I overheard the Dad say: “I can’t go in there. I’m not a girl.”

Grandmother to the rescue. I said “I’m a girl” and asked if I should try to help. (I didn’t want to barge in without permission.) In the bathroom, I asked the youngest girl if I could help her and when she tearfully nodded her head, I learned what the problem was. Her underwear was stained. I don’t know if it just happened or if she just discovered it, but she didn’t want to wear it anymore. “No problem — lets take it off.” Which meant, taking off her boots, skirt, leotards and her panties. Then putting the clothing back on. I told her we would wrap her panties up in a towel and give it to her father to take home. Problem solved. Luckily, her leotards also had panties. She didn’t have to go commando. Okay — I put her boots on the wrong feet and I put her skirt on backwards but both were easily fixed. I also cautioned the older girls who were teasing the younger one that they could easily have the same problem some time. They should have helped her, rather than laughed at her. And I remembered the tape that I listened to so many years ago — grandmother to the world.

I was recently at our accountants office, dropping off the information for income tax. He asked me where I got the ideas to write about. I mentioned that I have “friends in high places” who want me to write. They often provide me with the subject matter, and when I’m paying attention, I have a new blog.

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SACRED SPACE CONTINUED

Our son has a beautiful car, but it is not designed for snow and ice. He planned to take the car out Saturday — he got as far as the alley behind our house where he hit a patch of ice. Tires spun, no traction. We were still home — my husband was able to HELP — push the car back into the garage. We offered him our car but our son decided not to make the trip.

Because of the frigid temperatures, Robin hasn’t been getting her long walks and her sleeping through the night has been affected. Sadly when I wake up, I have trouble getting back to sleep. Instead of seven hours of sleep I’m getting four or five and it is taking it’s toll. Although I don’t have a cold, my nose is running and I’m coughing a lot. The various sleeping aids I’ve taken haven’t really helped.

We were still home and able to go to Mass on Saturday night. We used to go to church on Sunday morning but they have changed the Mass schedule. The early Mass is too early for my husband to rise, get dressed, take his medicine and get to church on time. We’ve been going on Saturday night. It works well, sort of. When we get home, I still have to make supper. We are eating even later. I’m trying to come up with dishes that will cook while we are gone.

We were at Mass for the first weekend celebration of Lent. In order to highlight the season, it was decided to limit the music to voice only — no piano or organ. The musical director assembled a choir and they sang from the balcony. They had beautiful voices but without music to announce the beginning of a song — the congregation could not participate. They didn’t have a printed song sheet — the music numbers were in the bulletin without the name of the songs. The cantor who had been in front for the beginning of Mass, went up to the loft. I have to admit that I like to sing, and missed joining in. I tried for the second song but that was not the song listed. I’ll admit that I gave up. I didn’t bother trying to join in on melodies we had rehearsed before Mass. It is said, that when you sing, you involve your whole body in the song. My body was definitely left out. I might have stayed calm except they sang a spiritual that I would have enjoyed singing. My dander began to rise. It reminded me of the Masses we used to have when I was still in school — the congregation DID NOT PARTICIPATE in the service. I decided that my concern needed to be shared. I found a friend who could pass my concern on to the pastor. Then I decided to tell him myself. He understood and had a few concerns of his own. He suggested that I talk to the music director. I didn’t think I would be able to do that — BUT I HAVE “FRIENDS IN HIGH PLACES”. I saw the music director pass my line of vision and took advantage of the opportunity. Then I found our pastor, and told him I had shared my concern.

And it isn’t even the anniversary of my father’s birthday yet. Even though the temperature is still in the single digits, the roads will be dry. We hope to travel to our daughters on his birthday.

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SACRED SPACE

SACRED SPACE

Its not like I forgot — the date just slipped my mind. I knew my father’s birthday was on the horizon. I momentarily forgot that the date of his passing was also near. My father passed over one month after the anniversary of my mother’s passing. I joked she called him home because he was having too much fun flirting with the nurses. He passed over four days before his 85th birthday — we are in SACRED SPACE.

The presence of “my friends in high places” is often felt more on anniversary’s, birthdays and holidays. Now I’m not suggesting that those are the only times when I sense their help — far from it. Any day, hour or minute is a prime time to “help” me and I’m grateful for their help — most of the time. I don’t appreciate being hit on the head.

We planned to be at our daughter’s in Central Illinois, to help her while her husband was out of town. I packed clothes to stay for seven days. My daughter and I talked about food — my husband is PICKY. That never was an extreme issue until his diabetes got in my face when he suffered a low sugar attack. I prefer to not have that happen again. Okay — I’ll admit it happened at home, I did the cooking. But often my husband doesn’t care for the food my daughter makes, she puts whole pieces of tomatoes and red peppers in her chili. When we are only there for a couple of days, it is not a problem. A full week on the other hand is more of a concern.

My bags were packed, the food for the trip organized — I was ready to go. Then GOD LAUGHED. He took our car away for four days. When we finally got it back, a snow storm was on the horizon. Travelling to our daughters exposes us to many miles of windswept highway. Then the temperatures tanked. Then I learned that the outside temperature downstate was as cold as at our house. Then I learned that while the first floor in our house cools considerably, our daughters first floor, because of the high ceiling becomes frigid. Even though I wear thermals and heavier clothing, I don’t do well with frigid. Trip postponed AGAIN!

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HEADS UP

Each morning I start the day by opening the Bible. Most of the time I open to the Old Testament — Isaiah, Sirach or Jeremiah –sometimes the Psalms or The Song of Songs. I rarely open to the New Testament. Depending on the day, month of the year and what is going on in my life or the world, the books and verses are varied. Over the years, I have learned to pay attention when I randomly open to Job or to Daniel — the story of the furnace. I DON’T LIKE seeing either of these readings. They usually mean that trouble is brewing.

Recently I opened the bible to the furnace on two separate occasions. The first time the men were singing praises to God and I thought the problem that was referred to might have been solved. Sadly, we have had trouble with our car -an oil leak — expensive to fix. The next time I opened the Bible to the furnace, the men were walking among the flames. The engine light came on in our car and a broken motor mount was discovered. Our garage had trouble getting the part — our car was in their garage for the snow storm. My husband took the car for its emission test and it passed. Then the yellow engine light came back on. There is a problem with the engine — what is wrong and how expensive it will be to fix remains to be seen. The car is at the garage and they are working on it. We had planned to go to our youngest daughter’s in Central Illinois. The temperature this week is the coldest this year, in fact it might even break records. It looks like we will be postponing our travel until the weather breaks.

We bought our car when my husband retired, many years ago. It has over a hundred thousand miles on the engine. Since we would like to keep it for many more years, we change the oil regularly. Our camper is over a hundred miles from our house, our grandchildren are further down the road in a different direction. It is important that we have a car that is comfortable and dependable.

Last week, I opened the Bible to the preface for the New Testament. When I opened the Bible to the introduction of the New Testament the following day — I wondered if that means the trouble with our car has ended. I really won’t mind.

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LOOKING BACK

LOOKING BACK

Time passes so quickly — minuets, hours, days, months, years quickly pass. Sometimes we notice the passage of time, especially when a birthday occurs and we notice we have added another year to our age. My last birthday a friend mentioned that I would notice the passage of time, and she was right.

Driving to meet my friend the other day, I watched a person on cross country skies in a park, gliding through the snow. It brought back wonderful memories. What I didn’t want to remember was my age at the time — my mantra for that year was “life begins at forty.” I still have my skies, but I don’t know if I would have the courage to put them on. My body isn’t as flexible as it was then and my weight is up. I don’t look forward to putting on skies to play in the snow. To be honest, I don’t look forward to snow either.

Looking back I remember other activities that have fallen by the wayside. I used to paint in oils. I haven’t had them out in years but they are waiting for me. I have tried watercolor — not as successfully and acrylics. I haven’t invested the time needed to become proficient — of course unless the paintings were good enough to sell, I don’t have wall space to display them.

Looking back — I was also involved in storytelling. I was a member of a guild and regularly attended storytelling events. Although I still tell stories to people who cross my path that need them, I don’t see myself becoming a professional storyteller. Because of that realization, I have parted with many of the books of fables and stories that I had hoped to use. The stories I tell are personal, they travel with me — I keep them in my pocket — always available.

Looking back — I have two sewing machines that were often in motion. I haven’t had the desire to sew anything in a few years but I’m not ready to say I have stopped. I haven’t had either my knitting needles or crochet hook out either. I still have yarn but haven’t seen anything that has inspired me.

If I’m honest, I have to admit that more has changed in my body than just age, and my flexibility and weight. My fingers don’t have the ability to work with small items, my eyes need stronger glasses and more light. When I start counting the negative changes that age and extra weight have caused in my life, I either see a person whose body is giving them more challenges than mine — cane, wheelchair or motorized scooter or a story of someone’s health challenges crosses my path. Often, that person is much younger than myself.

Time passes so quickly — it will soon be the anniversary of my father’s birthday and his passing. More than 20 years have gone by and thankfully he and others on the other side are still a part of my life.

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WAKING UP

An alarm went off at 6:15 this morning, waking me up. The interesting fact is the alarm was in my head, not an alarm clock or the radio. I’ve been having trouble sleeping all night. Members of our household have been waking me up at 3:00 AM and I have stayed awake for at least two hours before falling back to sleep. Last night I got to sleep off and on until 4:00. At 5:15 I was still awake and must have drifted off to sleep after that. WHY DID I HAVE TO GET UP AT 6:15? We didn’t have plans to go anywhere — no one unexpected or invited was coming to our house. Why did I have to get up?

I’ll admit that I have been receiving “help” from my friends in high places. I’m still trying to lose weight. I have already mentioned “their help” with my plans for breakfast when we were going out. They haven’t stopped there. I suppose it is my age but the weight is not falling off, instead it is giving me hugs and refusing to move. Recently I opened a 1996 Cooking Light book to an article on how strength training is of benefit to older people — 70 years to 90. The day before I read a magazine article on the same subject. I’m getting the message — I join Jane Fonda’s DVD once or twice a week to lift some weights. My weight, on the other hand, is still stuck.

My husband mentioned that when I danced to Richard Simmons I’ve lost weight. In desperation, I put a DVD on the machine and prepared to Party Off The Pounds. My note on that DVD said that I had only made it through the fourth dance the last time. That might have been the same this time except the phone rang and interrupted me for enough minutes that I was able to continue to the end. I still have all my pounds but I did get hungry.

The food that I’m logging and the exercise I’m doing is showing that I’m not eating all my exercise calories. I received an e-mail asking me if I thought I should eat the extra calories I’m working off or save them for an outing. Since I’m not melting the pounds, eating the extra calories doesn’t make too much sense. Something has to move this weight.

On another front — my mind or memory. I have been receiving messages to join Luminosity to help my brain. That probably would be a good thing if I would do it consistently but life gets busy and the best laid plans of mice and men fall by the wayside. I have much experience starting programs — some paid for and others free that have been forgotten within a short period of time. I received a message inviting me to try Fit Brain — it is free, up to a point. I must admit that I’m having fun, but I’m planning to stay at the free site. I won’t feel bad if life gets busy.

I probably should also state that the number of invitations to try various diet programs are increasing. If I could plan just my menus they might work, but including my husband sinks them before I start. I really don’t like preparing two separate meals. I’m stubborn, I’m not giving up — JUST YET.

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YEARLY REVIEW

Time is flying by too quickly. All of a sudden it is Christmas and time to write my yearly letter to send with our Christmas Cards. Sadly my mind is blank — I could have reread some of my thought rambles for the year to refresh my memory but I didn’t. It would have been to tempting to copy and paste — not write a personal letter. Instead I pulled out my Inner Reflections calendar for help. I was reminded of the challenging year that we had weather wise — more than 81 inches of snow, 20 days of subzero temperature, 10 days of rain. The weather breaking all records. And this year weather wise continues the pattern — clouds — no sun — for how many days now?

I was reminded that God is in charge of my life. I make plans and God laughs. Before a trip, we took our car in for an oil change and learned that another part needed to be replaced for safety. I planned to celebrate my birthday in the country, but the weather forecast — damp, cold — changed that plan. Instead we were in town. I walked over to the grocery store and learned they were giving out flu shots. When I asked if the nurse had the senior high dose, I learned she had brought two with her. Just enough for my husband and I. We got updated pneumonia shots too. I recently learned that the flu shots this year were not as effective — the virus had mutated. We just returned from visiting our grandchildren. Before we left, our grandson showed flu symptoms. So far my husband and I are healthy. Did the senior high dose protect us? Good question — but it was a lovely birthday present.

Our plans to celebrate Christmas have been changed because of health. Hopefully health and weather will cooperate for our new date. On a walk back home, I wondered why my cookie making plans last year were derailed. I finally remembered the day spent in the emergency wing of a hospital worried about my husband’s health.

A couple of weeks ago, an ambulance stopped across from our house in the middle of the night. I recognize the people across the street but not well enough to ring a door bell. I recognized the woman’s name on the prayer list at church. I asked another neighbor if he knew what was wrong. He didn’t have any answers. This morning, walking our dog who needed a longer walk, I walked past her house. As I passed, she came out to get her newspaper and I was able to speak to her. Breathing problems kept her in the hospital for four weeks.

This year I have more friends in “high places.” Some were expected, some were untimely accidents. Losing friends is ALWAYS hard — even though I know they are happy in their “new home.”

My weight is still too high, treasures (?) are still hiding in our house waiting to be uncovered. I’m reminded daily — THANKFULLY, GOD IS IN CHARGE!

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GROUNDED

CAR IS BACK. FINALLY! We didn’t get our car back on Wednesday — but the mechanic phoned on Thursday and told us they found and corrected the problem. There was a crack in the vacuum hose, which didn’t show up on the diagnostic programs.

I went to the Christmas Song Concert without my husband. He was concerned about the car. Since I like to sit at a table so that I can stretch my legs, I invited a woman to sit with me. This was the first time she attended the concert, her husband of over 48 years passed last year. After the concert and a few of my stories, she mentioned that she was glad she sat with me.

Meanwhile, I was wondering what else I had to do before I got my wings back. Christmas was coming, I had shopping to do. The first thing was to get my husband’s insulin. The next day — “Hello Stores. Did you miss me?”

We celebrate Christmas a week earlier so our youngest daughter and family can be home in their own house for Christmas Eve. Sadly this year, both my daughter and her husband were sick. They hadn’t planned to come but life intervened and plans changed again. My granddaughter forgot her coat at home. Thursday, the temperature was 52 degrees. The it dropped, down below freezing. Her mother and I went shopping for a new coat and thankfully found one on sale. The outing wasn’t good for my daughter though, she felt worse. She visited an Immediate Care office and was very pleased with the service. New, stronger prescription — she felt better when they left for home. It doesn’t hurt a mother to take a few days off, it didn’t hurt me to be able to give her that time.

My daughter wasn’t the only one who was grounded. A good friend of mine phoned to share that she fell, fracturing her hip. SHE CAN’T GO SHOPPING WITH ME! She had planned to decorate for a party, she had planned to attend another party the next day and God laughed. She has already had her operation. But rehab will take a while. I told her that we can go shopping with her walker. It will fit in my car.

I’m visiting two of my friends at the hospital today. I’m bringing a tin of Swedish cookies to each. Sally has been in the hospital for a few weeks, but my life was busy, then I was grounded. Sally’s 94 birthday is tomorrow and she is finally being released. I found a Christmas card from her from last year this morning while I was looking for a cookbook.

I’ve mentioned many times that I have friends in high places. The other Sunday, I got a glass of apple cider vinegar and water. I only was able to drink half the glass before my arm hit it, and spilled. I got another glass, my arm hit it again, spilling all over the floor. I didn’t get a third glass, put my coat on instead and headed for Mass.

Our youngest daughter and family have headed for home with their children and dogs. Our house is too quiet. They had their Christmas elf with them. Our Christmas tree, archway and pillars had banners counting the days until Christmas. That morning I opened Queen Of Angels to Angels as Playmates and Confidants. My father’s memorial card marked the page. “Hi DAD!”

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LEARNING THE ROPES

Mischief is afoot. I would raise the white flag but I know it won’t do any good. It took me awhile to become aware that someone was in training. But I’m a bit slow at times. Christmas is coming and my life will be busy. Not necessarily with parties and celebrations but baking and decorating the house seems to take more time and effort than it used to. I refuse to admit that it is because I’m heavier and older. I can’t do anything about being older but wouldn’t you think I’d be able to do something about the weight? I needed a few ideas to write a ramble about so they would publish during the time I was occupied with Christmas. My friends in high places are happy to oblige.

Anyway back to training. My friend Dorothy passed on Tuesday. My favorite knife DISAPPEARED on Wednesday morning. I have searched and searched without success. I remember putting it in its holder on the sink — GONE! I think life was relatively calm from Wednesday to Sunday but then my memory isn’t what it used to be. I know I should keep notes of the happening in my life but I don’t unless my attention is drawn to a happening — like my knife disappearing.

Saturday we celebrated Dorothy’s life. Sunday got my attention. Did she have time to rest, visit with those on the other side and was now ready to expand her knowledge. I don’t know but Sunday got my attention. It started with my husband’s poker game floating face down in the toilet. When did it go for a swim? Good question. I went to Mass and let the rest of the household sleep. I walked and it started to rain as I entered church. The gospel was the same as the reading at the service on Saturday. Our music director was late and a cantor with an excellent voice lead us in song.

On the home front, my husband’s day was interesting. Vitamins and pills had a life of their own — falling on the floor and spreading around the desk. He mentioned other happenings but I don’t remember. We decided we should take life easy and go out for breakfast. The restaurant was so packed we left for another place. Everybody must have been out for breakfast, finding a parking spot at the restaurants was impossible. I won’t bore you with the search just let me say five restaurants later we finally stopped to eat. Thankfully the food was very good.

Returning home, I wanted a cup of tea. Eight boxes of tea cascaded out of the cabinet all over the floor. I often switch to herbal teas early in the day and I have an assortment. I was reminded of all the flavors as I picked up the boxes and tried to get them settled again. Sometimes one or two boxes will fall — as if someone is helping me with the choice — but eight??

I wrote CELEBRATING A LIFE. Evidently some of my writing didn’t pass — the computer refused to save it. I deleted and changed a few thoughts. The ramble was saved!

I wanted to print something off of the computer and used the computer in my husband’s office. Trouble, trouble again. The computer had issues, when it finally let me access my e-mails — they were all gone. I was reminded of the fun my family experienced after my father passed and was learning how to mess with electronics the day of his wake. Our son and our daughter’s boyfriend each had different computer issues on that day.

Four days to visit and rest — that is about right.

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CELEBRATING A LIFE

In my writing, I try to protect the privacy of the persons who are included in my rambles — except for today. A very good friend of mine has passed to the other side. We met more than 25 years ago. Our company had merged with another, instead of traveling 10 minutes from home — I now had to drive over twenty miles, one way each day. I did the billing at our company — a job I retained when we moved. Dorothy was customer service. The welfare of her customers was first and foremost in her mind. We clashed — my ways and her ways DID NOT MESH! Dorothy was stubborn — so was I. From the clashes evolved a great friendship. When our company closed in 1991, we remained friends. We continued to talk on the phone, and go out to eat on a regular basis. She liked Chinese food — her daughter didn’t. I like Chinese food — my husband doesn’t. I drove our car to her house, but I HAD TO DRIVE her car wherever we were going. She was determined and for a change I gave in. We often picked up another working companion and then met a fourth. The four of us continued to get together for many years.

And the years passed and we aged. Dorothy and I got together in May of this year — visiting at her home instead of going out to eat. And I knew it would be the last time I would see her. Soon after, she had trouble breathing and was rushed to the hospital. Event followed event. When she was first hospitalized, she was in intensive care and I was unable to visit. Summer arrived which was very busy in our household, Dorothy was transferred to a nursing home but I was unable to visit. Her daughter provided me with updates about her condition. I bought a sympathy card in case I was unable to attend the services. It traveled with me all summer. Then fall arrived and the phone call I had been expecting arrived.

I knew I would only know Dorothy’s daughter and sons but I also knew I was going to the service and would stay for the prayers. I saw Dorothy’s daughter before I even entered the building. Dorothy’s illness has been hard on her, she has shrunk in size. When I entered the building, I saw a friend of Dorothy’s that she knew since childhood. She had joined us for several meals in various places. I thought she was a cousin but learned that the friend’s mother welcomed Dorothy who didn’t have any brothers or sisters into her own brood of six. Many of Dorothy’s friends dated back to childhood, or school, or early married life. When Dorothy made a friend, she developed and kept the friendship. Her oldest son shared a story of Dorothy’s trip to Greece. She had a heart attack and was hospitalized. Her son’s flew over to bring her home. Dorothy retained the friend ship she made in Greece until she passed.

I didn’t plan to stop to eat. But when I said goodbye to daughter and son’s, I was told that Dorothy would have wanted me to stop to eat. And I knew what they said was true. So I gave in.

I wore a pin to the service of four females representing the four who worked together. One is in Texas, one is in a senior assisted living home, Dorothy has passed over and I continue doing the best I can. The pin stayed somewhere along my route yesterday.

Dorothy often accompanied her daughter to Las Vegas or attended the various casinos in our area. She won a thousand dollars at an opening recently. This morning, I found my husband’s poker game floating in our toilet. I left him a note that the game was depressed, so it went for a swim. I fished it out and now it is surrounded by rice — hopefully it will work once it dries out. ?? What more can I say. Dorothy crossed over at the young age of 88 — WELCOME HOME. Have you joined my team in high places? Thankfully I KNOW you are there!

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