Random Acts of "Kindness"

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NO ICE

I am EXTREMELY THANKFUL this morning. I will admit that I was very stressed yesterday. The forecast was for rain, snow, than dropping temperatures — into the teens with below zero wind chills. Two weeks ago, we had rain, sleet and temperatures that dropped into the twenties. After two weeks, we still have remnants of that mess on sidewalks, streets and alleys. I was grounded for a day — (advised to stay inside) pavements were very icy and restricted for a few more days. I was very worried that we were repeating that mess. And when I am stressed I nibble continually.

I’ve written how I must be extremely needy since I receive HELP on a regular basis. Yesterday was a good example. In the morning I opened the bible to Psalm 146 — Trust in God the Creator and Redeemer. Queen of Angels reading was titled From Sickness to Health. Did that stop me from worrying? NOPE! It wasn’t only the weather, family matters were also causing their own concerns. But looking back on the day, I have to admit that I wasn’t nibbling from morning to night. I made a pot of chili, I took Robin for two walks while the pavement was wet but not icy. I walked to the store to get something I needed.

Today, the wind chill was below zero. I dug out my heavier coat and put on my boots. Robin got to wear a coat too. My husband had put salt on our outside steps the night before. I didn’t know how far I would be able to walk — staying upright, not falling was a concern. As soon as I stepped onto out sidewalk, “THANK YOU!” exploded from my mouth. NO ICE! The storm went further north so we didn’t get as much snow as forecast. The wind must have dried the streets, sidewalks, and alleys. There was still some ice, but not as much as I feared. Robin and I were able to take our normal walk.

This morning when I opened the bible I read from Psalm 84: “happy are those who trust in the Lord.” Queen Of Angels — repeated the theme “to trust God totally.” AND I DO but I also know that it is God’s plan, not mine! He/She could easily have planned that I would wake to a city covered in ice. And I would TRUST that I would survive the mess — hopefully not falling and causing damage to body parts.

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STUMPED

There are times when everything I try DOES NOT work. Today is one of those times. Years ago, when I first wrote To Pap, With Love — I filed for a state tax number. I thought that I would sell some of the books myself. Actually I did, but the number that was sold was less than 50, possibly much less.

Years have passed and I have made no personal sales but I still needed to file the sales tax form. Since the amount of money I owed was zero, I was informed to file electronically. Trying to do that today wound up with nothing but frustration. I finally got to the right screen, after many tries but my user name and password didn’t agree. If this was supposed to be easy, I missed a step. I will have to get help from a real person. But since this is the weekend, I will have to wait until Monday. I’m hoping that since I’ve had so many challenges I no longer need to file. Wouldn’t that be lovely!

OFTEN when I’m blocked, I’m not supposed to do what ever it is I’m trying to do. Maybe I’m cooking and nothing is going right. It is aggravating when I ruin the dish, or burn or cut myself. Maybe I’ll spill stuff all over the counter or floor. Sometimes I can determine the reason for the mishap. Often it just becomes one of the great mysteries.

Recently I was trying to phone a friend — the call didn’t go through — twice. Then I tried a different person and received their answering machine. Not giving up, I tried a third only to learn that I was calling at a bad time. I finally decided that I wasn’t supposed to be on the phone. I don’t know why — it is another of the mysteries.

I have written a couple of thought rambles about our dog, Robin. We have had many dogs in our lifetime, Robin’s personality beats all of them. She is definitely unique. I think that I wrote that she lead our son upstairs because he came down without his shoes. He needed his shoes to take her for a walk. I had been closing our bedroom door to keep the noise of my TV from disturbing anyone else. Robin got mad at me, she thought I was keeping her out. It took a few days before I was forgiven. She opens the bathroom doors to see who is inside. Just checking! Recently she got mad at my husband — he is her person. He took her for a walk and wouldn’t let her eat something she found. When they got home, she turned her back on him. He tried to give her a favorite treat but she turned her face away. It took some time before she forgave him.

Life is busy. My husband has enrolled with the Veterans Administration and that has added more appointments to the calendar. Many of the appointments are at the hospital, 30 miles from home. We had a lovely, warm winter. IT IS CHANGING. Rain, turning to snow, turning to temperatures in the teens will turn to ice. Of course, none of the appointments are life threatening and we can always cancel. The next two weeks we will be gone more than we will be home. Our Christmas tree is still up and I don’t know when I will have the time to take it down. Valentines? Easter eggs?

My “friends” edit my rambles — if I share something that shouldn’t be said — the ramble isn’t saved. I guess this one is okay — no trouble posting it.

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TOUCH

I’ve read that Mother Theresa had one visitation that so impressed her that it influenced the rest of her life. I guess I have to admit that I’m challenged or very needy. Either that or my current job is that I’m supposed to write — extremely challenged to come up with a topic or a title so I receive LOTS of HELP. For which I’m EXTREMELY grateful — most of the time. I’ll admit that GROUNDED was challenging.

What am I ranting on about now, you may ask. I’ve learned that often when I share a story, it awakens a memory with another that they were afraid to share, keeping it a secret, afraid they will be thought of as NUTS. Well here I go again.

I’ve often admitted that for the most part, I neither see nor hear “my friends in high places.” Occasionally something occurs where I experience a presence. Right after TO PAP, WITH LOVE was published, I was downtown, planning an advertising campaign. I thought of going back to a store that I had passed that advertised a sale. I felt a touch on my shoulder, urging me to go forward, skip the store. It was good advice — TO PAP never became a best seller but it helped many people. The book is still available on line.

After my husband retired — his plan was that we would sell our home and move to the country. I was walking down a main street by our home when I felt my feet root into the ground. A message that we should remain in our home for the time being.

Recently I felt a dog brush against my thigh. Looking down Robin was no where around. I have MANY four footed friends on the other side. Trying to guess which one paid me a visit is impossible. I’m sure that one or more wander with me on a regular basis. After Cuyler passed all of a sudden I was the Pied Piper of dogs. Dogs that were strangers wanted my attention. They often distressed their owners by the way they carried on. And that might explain Robin’s behavior. Before she always wanted to play with dogs we are passing. Now she growls and barks — protecting me? She isn’t happy when strange dog scents are on my hands when I come home after wandering without her. Dogs are able to sense many things that are mysteries to two footed humans. Recently a service dog at the hospital indicated that I was his friend. The owner finally agreed that I could pet him after he saw how his dog was acting. A neighborhood poodle also thought I was his long lost friend.

We live in a good neighborhood but sadly the world is changing — and not for the better. I’ve learned that I’m NEVER ALONE and I must admit that it is a comforting feeling. I will also admit that I’m not about to wander were my “helpers” are challenged.

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GROUNDED

CAR IS BACK. FINALLY! We didn’t get our car back on Wednesday — but the mechanic phoned on Thursday and told us they found and corrected the problem. There was a crack in the vacuum hose, which didn’t show up on the diagnostic programs.

I went to the Christmas Song Concert without my husband. He was concerned about the car. Since I like to sit at a table so that I can stretch my legs, I invited a woman to sit with me. This was the first time she attended the concert, her husband of over 48 years passed last year. After the concert and a few of my stories, she mentioned that she was glad she sat with me.

Meanwhile, I was wondering what else I had to do before I got my wings back. Christmas was coming, I had shopping to do. The first thing was to get my husband’s insulin. The next day — “Hello Stores. Did you miss me?”

We celebrate Christmas a week earlier so our youngest daughter and family can be home in their own house for Christmas Eve. Sadly this year, both my daughter and her husband were sick. They hadn’t planned to come but life intervened and plans changed again. My granddaughter forgot her coat at home. Thursday, the temperature was 52 degrees. The it dropped, down below freezing. Her mother and I went shopping for a new coat and thankfully found one on sale. The outing wasn’t good for my daughter though, she felt worse. She visited an Immediate Care office and was very pleased with the service. New, stronger prescription — she felt better when they left for home. It doesn’t hurt a mother to take a few days off, it didn’t hurt me to be able to give her that time.

My daughter wasn’t the only one who was grounded. A good friend of mine phoned to share that she fell, fracturing her hip. SHE CAN’T GO SHOPPING WITH ME! She had planned to decorate for a party, she had planned to attend another party the next day and God laughed. She has already had her operation. But rehab will take a while. I told her that we can go shopping with her walker. It will fit in my car.

I’m visiting two of my friends at the hospital today. I’m bringing a tin of Swedish cookies to each. Sally has been in the hospital for a few weeks, but my life was busy, then I was grounded. Sally’s 94 birthday is tomorrow and she is finally being released. I found a Christmas card from her from last year this morning while I was looking for a cookbook.

I’ve mentioned many times that I have friends in high places. The other Sunday, I got a glass of apple cider vinegar and water. I only was able to drink half the glass before my arm hit it, and spilled. I got another glass, my arm hit it again, spilling all over the floor. I didn’t get a third glass, put my coat on instead and headed for Mass.

Our youngest daughter and family have headed for home with their children and dogs. Our house is too quiet. They had their Christmas elf with them. Our Christmas tree, archway and pillars had banners counting the days until Christmas. That morning I opened Queen Of Angels to Angels as Playmates and Confidants. My father’s memorial card marked the page. “Hi DAD!”

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FRUSTRATED

I noticed that when I was driving our car, it seemed to hesitate when I was waiting for a light to change. At first, it occurred only once or twice when I was stopped at a light. Sometimes it didn’t happen at all. I first noticed it in the summer, when my husband was driving. It reappeared in October and didn’t seem to happen when I was driving. But whatever is wrong with the car — happened more often. I was concerned. I was afraid that our car would stop when we were in the country and we wouldn’t get it started again..

Since my husband has signed up with the Veteran program — the hospital that he will use is more than 30 miles away from home. It is mostly express way or toll way driving which is why we chose that particular place rather than something in the city with its traffic problems. He had an appointment on Tuesday and I was concerned that we might get stuck on the highway. He took the car into the garage on Monday, which was our only free day for the week. (The rest of the week was extremely busy — my plans, God laughed.)
They determined the problem was caused by the ignition module and changed it. Tuesday morning, the car was worse. My husband had an appointment with a doctor in North Chicago. There was NO WAY we were driving that far. I canceled the appointment and rescheduled. The car went back to the garage — this time it was a fuel injection part. I had planned to ask about my husband’s prescription for insulin at the hospital. He was on his last pen and refills hadn’t arrived. The VA doctor had informed me that she had ordered the medicine.

Wednesday, we had planned to go to the clinic for an exercise and nutrition class. We drove three stop lights when the original problem occurred AGAIN. Sadly, we drove the car back to the garage. I phoned the clinic and cancelled our class, inquiring into the prescription for the insulin. I learned that the prescription was on hold — it hadn’t been approved yet. Nobody told us. Arriving back home, I placed an order for a refill with his non VA prescription. It will cost us more money but we will have control. I won’t have to worry about the mail delivery.

It is Thursday. The car is STILL AT THE GARAGE! They haven’t figured out what is causing the problem. Thankfully we can go to the songfest scheduled for today by walking. I can take a bus to get my husband’s prescription. With our unexpected free time, I baked cookies and put up more Christmas decorations. I am really praying that the problem with our car will be resolved. Even though it has more than 200,000 miles — it was running without any problems. We can’t afford to replace it right now.

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VISIT

I’ve already shared that I start the day with a reading from the bible, followed by a reading from Queen Of Angels. Tuesday I opened the bible to Jeremiah 46 — “The message which the Lord gave to the prophet Jeremiah.” I opened Queen of Angels to — “Do I recognize this time of my visitation?” Did I pay special attention to these readings? Good question — answer “NO”.

It was a shopping day — my husband needed prescription refills. While at the store I decided that I would down load the pictures from my camera, get ready for Christmas. The machine DID NOT recognize the film. Neither did the other two machines that I tried. Going back to the first machine that had been successful in the past, I put the film in, which promptly fell to the floor. The film is a micro, very tiny. Immediately I was concerned — was the film damaged? Had I lost all my pictures? Evidently the fall woke the film up, the photos loaded onto the machine — over two hundred. After I chose the hard copy photos, ordered the DVD, I learned that the photo machines were down. Copies would take longer to process. When I shared my experience to a friend at the store, she remarked, “You know what was going on don’t you?” I will admit that I wasn’t surprised when I was told the printers were acting up. I didn’t necessarily put one and one together.

The rest of the shopping trip followed suit. My husband and I stopped at Fed X to make copies of the Christmas Letter. Then we stopped at a grocery store. It isn’t my normal shopping place — I only needed coffee and flour. Four shopping bags later — not only did I have coffee and flour, I had Dreamfield elbow macaroni, which is very hard to find and other supplies which were also on sale. After all, Christmas is coming and I have cookies to bake. I’m going to have to visit this store more often.

We stopped for lunch at a fast food place — wraps were the special of the day. One of the choices was Greek. When I inquired, I learned it was a gyro in a wrap. It was delicious, it was huge, half of it went home with me.

We returned to Costco to see if the pictures were ready. They were! Walking to our car, I found a couple of evergreen branches on the pavement. I LOVE the smell of evergreens, they came home with me. We have an artificial tree.

We stopped at the pet supply store — they had a new flavor in a brand that I buy for Robin — Merrick Great Plains Red Recipe — Robin LOVED IT — out of the bag, no cheese added.

We stopped at Trader Joes. I mentioned to the person running the samples that I looked for Fried Mushrooms with out success. As I was standing in line, he came out with two bags of frozen mushrooms, that had just come in. One was my fried mushrooms — it came home with me.

Arriving home, I was greeted by a huge poinsettia plant on the table, a gift from our neighbors.

Did I have a visitation that day? I know so!

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FRIDAY

I’m not superstitious — I didn’t expect problems on Friday the 13th. I had problems in SPADES! We had visited our doctor the day before and he requested the pricing on my husband’s medicines. My husband has enrolled with the VA and getting his prescriptions from the VA would save us money. The problem — the VA doesn’t have many of my husband’s medicines nor do they have a substitute. I had copied the pricing for his medicines when we were looking for a new prescription plan.

I found the paperwork BUT when I looked at the pricing — it didn’t make sense. Some of the costs in the GAP were lower than the non-GAP pricing. I tried to access the pricing on the computer. Roadblocks upon roadblocks. I tried phoning our agent for the insurance. He wasn’t available and didn’t return my phone call. I tried accessing the insurance plan itself. My first phone call — I was on hold for a very long time. When I finally contacted a person, I LOST the call. I wasn’t able to get the pricing on all the medicines but I did get the cost of medicines he would have filled in December.

I had asked for the doctor’s e-mail address before leaving the office. The e-mail wouldn’t go through — WRONG ADDRESS. I tried phoning the doctor’s office, and left a message on their answering machine. The message must have gotten lost, my phone call wasn’t returned.

I heated a container of chicken noodle soup in the microwave, then spilled the hot liquid all over my hands. I kept reminding myself that it was Friday the 13th. Lavender essential oil helped the burn.

We received a check in the mail, and was advised we didn’t have direct deposit. I KNEW I had filled out the information but evidently it didn’t stick. One phone call later, the woman I talked to, after giving her all the information requested realized she could only answer questions, not input the information. I was told to call back on Monday. ?? Friday the 13th — AGAIN!

Saturday — sunny, windy, cool day. Our grandchildren were in town and I thought a visit to Maggie Daley park would be possible. The kids dressed in layers so they could take off their heavy coat when they got overheated. They had a fantastic time until our grandson collided with a sculptured tree in the enchanted forest. He had experienced a concussion in the spring which really limited his activities. His head HURT –he was afraid that he had received another concussion. I have to admit that I was worried as well.

Leaving the park, I slipped on the stairs and quickly descended. Somehow I managed to stop the fall with my shoulder, wedging it into the railing. Sore shoulder AGAIN but nothing broken.

Sunday, I realized that both my grandson and I had received “HELP”. Although both of our injuries could have been severe, we had been protected from serious injury. The bruise on my arm was on a muscle, not on the shoulder itself. Sunday I learned of the attacks in Paris on Friday. No wonder I had so many problems, my friends were busy else where. Thankfully they were back on Saturday.

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SPEAK UP

Growing up, I was very shy. For many reasons I stayed in the background — not actively participating unless I was called on in school. With the passing of time I’ve changed. I took a speech class in junior college, none of my classmates believed it when I said in a speech that I was shy. I’m still not an activist, still staying in the background until I feel strongly enough about something to speak out. I have no trouble cautioning children when I think someone is going to get hurt.

Recently I’ve learned that something I wrote about has made a difference. At the camper, across from our campsite, is a small park. The playground equipment is limited — a slide, climbing bar and a swing set. Our children and grandchildren have played there over the years. Even though the playground is so small and limited, children in our area visit it on a regular basis. On Saturday, when we were allowed to return to the campground after the tornado, the park was hidden from view by fallen trees. The slide was completely demolished. The swing set remained untouched. On Sunday, I heard children’s voices coming from the park. On Monday, a group from the Southern Baptist church were in the park, removing trees, making it safer for the children to play. On Monday I wrote a speak up sheet asking that the park be replaced, children were already using it. I learned that plans were in place to replace the park. Since that conversation, I didn’t think about the park anymore.

The week before we closed up the camper for the winter, a couple of men were across the street in the park when we returned from an outing. I walked across the street to talk. I learned two facts — first: plans were in place to get new equipment for the park. The swing was the first piece of equipment that was placed in the park when it was created. The slide set that was tossed by the winds had been more recently installed. The second thing that I learned was that management HAD NOT PLANNED TO REPLACE THE PARK. I was extremely glad that I had wrote a speak up sheet. Sometimes our words make a difference!

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STEPPING UP

Driving home I thought of the PERFECT TITLE for a thought ramble. Of course I thought I would remember! Are you laughing yet? I think “my friends in high places” are. They just erased everything I have written so far. This is “help” in the extreme. Maybe it is not a subject that I should share.

Bit by bit I’m trying to do the best I can with each day. Although I regularly attend Catholic Mass, many years ago the message came through that my involvement with our church should be limited. I could detail the many occurrences that brought that message into my mind but I don’t know if those experiences would help you. It seemed that my stories would be better served with people outside of our church.

(Right now my mind is not remembering the theme of the ramble!) Today I joined a group of my friends at a retirement home where our parish priest was saying Mass. Arriving, I learned that one of my friends was in charge of setting up the refreshments and I knew that I would help out. I can still walk unaided and my arms and hands still function. Many of the participants use walkers or canes. I was right. I even surprised myself when I was able to carry some of the chairs. During Mass, I sat next to a woman who shared my maternal grandmother’s first name — Molly. Sadly I learned she is suffering from Alzheimer’s.

I had brought photos with me — of the summer — of the devastation from the tornado, of the Japanese Garden, of Natchusa and it’s buffalo’s, of the new nature park in the city. They aren’t able to wander as freely as they once where and I like to share. A friend liked a photo I had taken of the waterfall at the Japanese garden and thought she might like to paint it. I was happy to give the photo to her.

This has been a beautiful blue sky day. Arriving back home — we took Robin to the dog beach. She is very quiet in the car except now she recognizes the beach and starts to cry as we park. A female dog who recently gave birth tried to join me in our car. I learned she had eight puppies. The owner was keeping two of them. As we were leaving the beach, I commented that we had lost our female chocolate Lab a few years ago. He mentioned that he had lost his shepherd after 25 years. “You know she is fine on the other side,” I told him. “No, he didn’t,” he replied. At that I shared a short version of Shanae’s gift to me, — when I saw her spirit RUNNING through the house when we sent her home. I have to admit that that gift has made the passing of our other dogs easier to handle.

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FOG

I remember when I had energy. I remember when I was able to sleep the whole night. I remember when I actually planned the things I wanted to do, or the stuff I needed to buy from the store. Sadly, my energy is hiding. Sadly although I get some rest, I still feel tired — my sleep is too broken. Sadly although I still make lists of what I need from the store, the list is often still sitting on the table when I leave the house, or it is missing some important items.

I’m hoping that this is only a temporary condition. I’m hoping that as we spend more time at home, I will be less fractured. I’m hoping that I will regain an interest in some of the activities I enjoy. Looking at our calendar, Thanksgiving is coming soon, and following after is Christmas. Today I have no interest in Christmas shopping and of course, no time to make presents. To complicate matters, many health appointments are now filling up our schedule. At least we had planned to stay in town.

I had considered checking out some activities at a near by senior center. I don’t know if I will have the time to participate. What I have learned as I try to surface from this fog is that if I ask a question, I’m often given an answer. The question seems to be jogging my memory or my “friends” are helping.

Just a couple of examples — standing in the pantry, I had come in with a purpose and the purpose had vanished. “Why am I here?” That question often provokes an answer. Recently while shopping, I knew that I had planned to go to a store to buy something. It wasn’t a store I normally went to, and I didn’t remember what I had planned to buy but I knew I thought it was important. It was on my mental list a few days ago, but I hadn’t had the time to purchase. Stopped at a traffic light, I threw questions out into the air. “Where do I need to go? What do I need to buy? Etc.” Thankfully I received an answer. I had wanted to buy a new calendar for next year. The one I’ve enjoyed this year is meant more for business people who have to keep track of their appointments. I’ve used it to track my food and other things. At the beginning of the month, it has a page for the whole month where I schedule appointments. As time gets closer to the new year, it becomes harder to buy specific calendars. Having a calendar for 2016 has already come in HANDY!

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